Marriage By Design

“But from the beginning of creation, God made them male and female. Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So, they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

~Mark 10:6-9

When God created Eve, she was designed to complement Adam, to be his helper, friend, and companion. She was everything he was not and together, they completed one another, and were designed perfectly for one another. God designed men and women to fit together in form, but also in thought, feelings, and abilities. He not only designed us, He designed marriage in the same way.

It is no secret that divorce surrounds us in today’s world. Statistics say that more than fifty percent of today's marriages will end in divorce, including those couples who attend church regularly. There is something terribly wrong with that. Marriage is a gift from God and He hates divorce, so why is divorce so prominent in today’s society?

Part of that can be answered by saying that, like everything else, today’s life is disposable. We seek pleasure more than God, we want what we want when we want it, and when we’re finished with it, we throw it away. Our society holds nothing sacred, including marriage. Even our children are now taught that the Bible is not the word of God, and we are to keep our mouth shut and let people do what they want. Our children are taught that homosexuality is just as natural as heterosexuality, and same-sex couples demand marriage rights alongside opposite sex couples. That is not how God designed marriage, and He does not approve of any marriage outside of a man and woman, nor does He approve of any marriage outside of the biblical pattern.

So, what can we do to change that outlook? The answer lies only with God and a change of heart in people. God knows what is good for us because He created us with purpose in His own image. We are here on earth for a reason, and that is to glorify God through His Son, Jesus Christ.

“For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths (2 Timothy 4:3-4).”

Read 1 Corinthians 1-5

© 2018 Marie McGaha

Please The Lord

“So, if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”

~Philippians 2:1-4

My youngest son calls me every day when he gets off work. He’s a rookie cop, has a lot of stress and I debrief him. It’s a kind of counseling session where he can get his frustration out without it having negative consequences. And of course, mama doesn’t mind those calls from her baby boy. He is a daily reminder that God’s call on my life is to help others, to share wisdom, good counsel, and show the love of Christ in whatever way I can.

“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish but understand what the will of the Lord is (Ephesians 5:15-17).” 

We live in a selfish world, where those who scream the loudest get their own way. We live with the foolishness of the world, but we don’t have to be part of the foolishness. We cannot change the world. What we can change is how we handle the world. We don’t have to affect the entire world, just the world around us. No matter what is going on with others, we can still behave in a manner pleasing to the Lord. We can find what is good and pure and right in our own lives, without allowing the negativity of the world to affect us. We cannot change how the world acts, but we can determine how we act. We are responsible for ourselves, our actions, and our reactions to others. When we exercise self-control and act in love, we are pleasing to the Lord.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires (Galatians 4:22-24).”

Read Romans 13-16

©2018 Marie McGaha

The Promised Land

“Then all the congregation raised a loud cry, and the people wept that night. And all the people of Israel grumbled against Moses and Aaron. The whole congregation said to them, ‘Would that we had died in the land of Egypt! Or would that we had died in this wilderness! Why is the Lord bringing us into this land, to fall by the sword? Our wives and our little ones will become a prey. Would it not be better for us to go back to Egypt?’ And they said to one another, ‘Let us choose a leader and go back to Egypt.’”

~Numbers 14:1-4

The Israelites had been slaves in Egypt for more than 400 years before Moses and Aaron led them from their captors, across the desert to the promised land. Of course, they complained and grumbled the entire way, which is why it took them 40 years of wandering before they reached the Jordan River and could see the land of milk and honey. Then they heard about the people who lived in the land and were terrified, so they grumbled some more and wanted to dump their leaders, find new ones and go back to Egypt.

It seems ridiculous to us now. Why on earth would they want to go back to the slavery they endured when freedom and prosperity was right in front of them? But it’s human nature to return to what once was, even if it’s not good for us. I’ve seen people leave behind their addictions, toxic relationships, prison, bad company and worse, only to go right back to their life of slavery.

“Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. For we have come to share in Christ, if indeed we hold our original confidence firm to the end (Hebrews 3:12-14).”

Sharing in the salvation of Christ is our deliverance from lives of sin and sorrow. We are set free from the things of the world and are brought to the Promised Land, which is eternal life. But we must continue in the promise of redemption, and not turn back to the life we led that was taking us to hell.

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God (Hebrews 12:1-2).”

Read Romans 9-12

©2018 Marie McGaha

Speak Sweet

“For no good tree bears bad fruit, nor again does a bad tree bear good fruit, for each tree is known by its own fruit. For figs are not gathered from thorn bushes, nor are grapes picked from a bramble bush. The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.”

~Luke 6:43-45

My husband and I have been married for nearly 20 years. We are each other’s best friend, and we know we are together until death parts us, and then we’ll spend eternity together in Heaven. We are still madly, passionately, stupidly in love and cannot conceive a life without the other. Still, we can get on each other’s nerves from time to time. He does stuff that just makes me wonder if there’s a kink in the genes no one told me about. And occasionally, I can upset him too. Yes, I’m making light of the ways I can torque his engine. But the one thing I try to remember, no matter what, is how much we love each other, and I try to never say things that I can’t take back. It’s not easy when tempers heat up to keep harsh words from coming out, but he and I certainly have a better handle on it now than in the early years of our marriage.

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear (Ephesians 4:29).”

When we get angry, it can be easy to speak hurtful words but when we do, we can destroy friendships, marriages, and any chance of reconciliation. Angry words tear down and can’t be taken back. Even if we apologize for the words we speak, they remain in the heart and mind of the one they’re directed to. And every additional word spoken in anger adds to the previous words and weighs heavily until it breaks. While we all get angry at times, it’s what we do while angry that can tear a relationship apart or we can bridle our tongues (James 1), even in anger, and show love and compassion. Being angry does not mean being hateful.

“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Therefore, put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls (James 1:19-21).”

Read Acts 25-28; Weekend reading Romans 1-8

©2018 Marie McGaha

Blow Over Me

“When the day of Pentecost arrived, they were all together in one place. And suddenly there came from Heaven a sound like a mighty rushing wind, and it filled the entire house where they were sitting. And divided tongues as of fire appeared to them and rested on each one of them.  And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and began to speak in other tongues as the Spirit gave them utterance.”

~Acts 2:1-4

I’ve always liked the wind; whether it was coming off the ocean when I was a kid at the beach with my grandmother, or hitting my face while riding down the road on a motorcycle, or a storm blowing in, I’ve always found the wind refreshing. I think it’s because I see the correlation between wind and the Spirit of God. I cannot see the wind, but I can see its affects around me, and I can feel it brush over my skin and blow though my hair. I cannot see God, but I see His affect on my life and I can feel His Spirit in my heart.

“The wind blows where it wishes, and you hear its sound, but you do not know where it comes from or where it goes. So it is with everyone who is born of the Spirit.”

~John 3:8

When we are born of the Spirit, we have an intimate relationship with God Almighty. It is as real in our life as any tangible relationship we have on earth. Even though we don’t physically see God, and can’t touch Him with our hands, He touches us in ways that no one else can. Sensing God’s Spirit is something He allows us to do with our minds, hearts and spirits when we are born again through the redemption offered by Jesus Christ. No other relationship on earth can cleanse us from our sins, make our lives brand new, give us an eternal purpose, and turn us from hell onto the path of Heaven. It is only though a relationship with Jesus Christ that we can experience true righteousness, abiding love, and hope for a future.

“Jesus said to them again, ‘Peace be with you. As the Father has sent Me, even so I am sending you.’ And when He had said this, He breathed on them and said to them, ‘Receive the Holy Spirit’ (John 20:21-22).”

“There's a wind a-blowin', all across the land
A fragrant breeze of Heaven
Blowin’ once again
Don't know where it comes from
Don't know where it goes
But let it blow over me
Oh, sweet wind, come and blow over me…”

Sweet Wind by David Ruis

Read Acts 20-24

©2018 Marie McGaha

Love Your Mother

‘On the third day a wedding took place at Cana in Galilee. Jesus’ mother was there, and Jesus and His disciples had also been invited to the wedding. When the wine was gone, Jesus’ mother said to Him, “They have no more wine.” “Woman, why do you involve me?” Jesus replied. “My hour has not yet come.” His mother said to the servants, “Do whatever He tells you.”’

~John 2:1-5

As a mother, this is one of my favorite passages. Here is the Lord Jesus Christ, God Himself, at a wedding and His mother wants Him to provide wine for the guests—and He wasn’t the host! I think the reason it appeals to me so much is because I have sons and it doesn’t matter to me what their job is, or who they married, or how many grandchildren they’ve given me, they are my boys and I love them. More than that, I know how much they love me and will do anything I ask them to do for me, even if it meant making the wine for a wedding. Obedience to God, to our parents, and to our spouses is an important part of who we are as Christians. And even if I didn’t already love the Lord for what He’s done for me, I’d love Him even more for the way He loves His mother.

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother (this is the first commandment with a promise), that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land (Ephesians 6:1-3).” 

While we are young, obeying our parents is for our own well-being and safety. We are under their care and they provide for our needs. As we get older and come into a sense of independence, we may begin to push the boundaries our parents set for us, and sometimes, we may push those boundaries too far. There are consequences for our actions, and even though we may be too young to understand those consequences, they may affect our lives for years to come. There is a reason the Lord wants us to be obedient as children—there’s a steep learning curve that can have immediate and dire repercussions, some that we may never recover from. On the other hand, as we mature and become adults, we are told to “honor” our mother and father, and that’s different than obedience. Honor means to show respect and hold in high esteem. Even parents who weren’t the greatest at parenting deserve our respect. When we honor our parents, we honor the Lord.

“Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the Name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him (Colossians 3:12-17).”

Read Acts 13-19

©2018 Marie McGaha

No Worries

“Out of my distress I called on the Lord; the Lord answered me and set me free. The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me?”

~Psalm 118:5-6

So many times in life we become distressed over things that happen—our jobs, our families, our love lives, finances, and a million other little things that make up the human experience. We react emotionally to situations, and if we’re really honest, there’s no reason to. We have been conditioned to listen to our emotions instead of what God says about every situation: trust Him. The psalmist says he was distressed but he didn’t go on Facebook or Twitter and post about it, or scream and yell at other people, or break things, or act like so many that we see today on TV and social media. No, he called on the Lord. Then what happened? The Lord answered him and set him free. So, he declared, “The Lord is on my side; I will not fear!” And that is the appropriate response for anyone who claims to be a Christian.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths (Proverbs 3:5-6).”

For us to live the kind of lives that honors the Lord, we must trust that He knows what’s best for us, even in the face of crisis. I’m not saying there aren’t situations that are going to cause us to be angry, or depressed, or broken hearted, that’s life and it happens to all of us—it’s our response to those situations that should set us apart from the rest of the world. If our spouse dies, of course there is an emotional response but there are appropriate emotions and inappropriate emotions. The appropriate emotions would be sadness, tears, feeling lonely and empty; inappropriate emotions would be to break things, get drunk or high, blame others, or seek revenge. That might seem ridiculous, but people do react to stressors in very destructive ways. Ways that are not in line with what the Lord wants from us.

“If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory. Put to death therefore what is earthly in you… (Colossians 3:1-5).”

“And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him (Colossians 3:15-17).”

Read Acts 7-12

©2018 Marie McGaha